• An ode to Phoebe

    My hips, my belly, my bottom have grown.

    You have made my boobs hang low.

    Now when I sleep, I spoon a nappy basket and a spare babygro

    Yet the minute I look at you, what I did before, I do not know.

    I sleep in cycles of please don’t bloody wake.

    And I my bones have still not recovered.

    But when you laugh and smile at me, I forgot all of those aches.

    The poo, the vomit, the wee I have seen

    That hour before bed when I want to throw you in the bin

    Yet when you wake and smile at me, my heart grows a little stronger.

     Every milestone that I see, I feel so very proud

    And suddenly those exhausting moments, become a distant cloud.

    Thank goodness for you, thank god for wine

    For you are my little sweet child of mine,

    Ali x

  • Turning 6 Months





    So Phoebe is now closer to being one than a newborn. Excuse me whilst I weep at this. I am pretty sure I am not mentally equipped for this baby experience to whizz by this fast.

    Saying that, we are at the point of Phoebe being so utterly fascinated and into everything that I cannot help but really enjoy watching her take this crazy old world in.

    As she has passed the 6 months mark, she has suddenly become a little person. She is no longer just this cute little parasite who thanks you in coos and smiles. She interacts with you and responds. She likes to play games and has started making noises to get my attention. she eats food and eyes up everything that enters my mouth.

    This little person has started to sit up and see the world from a different angle. All these changes are amazing and every day something new happens.

    Things I could live without. Hair pulling. She almost gets this demonic look in her eyes and she takes every opportunity to pull my hair out. Forget tying it up, oh she will find it, like a moth to a flame.

    In fact pulling everything. Necklaces, scarves, beards, you name it. You will be stripped and possibly bleed. Yes she is just exploring but no I do not need my moles removed and I kind of like my hair.

    So as the milestones come thick and fast, I am realising that yes the craziness of motherhood is pretty immense but wow it is precious,

    Ali x

  • Holiday?

    I think we need to come up with a new word for “Holiday”

    If you look up the definition of holiday: It refers to days of rest and recreation…

    Excuse me whilst I pah ha ha all over the computer screen.

    I used to go on holiday, I used to sunbathe all day and drink Pina Colada’s. I used to swim in the pool and read salacious gossip magazines and listen to music.

    Going away with a small one is more like a work trip, a rite of passage. There will be no sunbathing, no cocktails, no flirting with the waiters.

    Instead you are shitting bricks about the bedroom with no black out blinds, and the travel cot that breaks your back. You are cursing because you did not bring enough vests and your small one has taken to crapping up their back.

    That you could of gone away for two nights or three months and still had to take away the same amount of stuff. The stuff that took you two weeks to pack as packing with a small one is a little like torture.

    Sure you have a lovely time and you see things you may not have seen now that you can not lay still for more than ten minutes. You even enjoy yourself and get to have a glass of wine after you have wrestled the small bag of snakes to sleep. *child*

    But Holiday. Nope no siree, not from my experience.

    We need to come up with a new word for it because “Oh my god, I am so exhausted and I am never leaving my black out blinds again, is a little long,

    Ali x

  • The buggy brigade

    I see you buggy brigade, as I walk through town.

    A gaggle of prams, sporting mums with sunglasses on, matching Yummy Mummy bags and hair buns and eyeing up every lone mum.

    I see you as I am holding Phoebe under my arm as she screams for her milk but I am so desperately hungry that I am deep throating a cocktail sausage whilst pushing the pram.

    I see you as I have dried vomit on my shoulder and yesterdays hairdo.

    Like hawks you eye up my beautiful pram and wonder why you haven’t seen me at baby yoga or any of the other 65 baby groups. I see you assessing me and wondering my story.

    I see you and for a moment I wonder myself but then as I walk past I forget you as I push my life home and it is okay,


  • Blog giveaway

    6 Months is almost here. My teeny tiny baby is nearly half a year old already.

    So to celebrate Phoebe turning 6 months on the 2nd of July, I thought I would do a blog giveaway on Instagram.

    Everyone has been so supportive to us on Instagram and it is time I said thanks.

    You know I am a shopper and that I love quirky, vintage and retro style things so I thought it apt to share the love of one of my favourite shops for Phoebe so far. retrokids This shop has won my heart and my wallet and for that all of the prizes are from there with a David Bowie customised baby grow for your dancing pleasure.

    The Prize includes: A lapin & Me woodland doll, A4 fruit print by Dessin Designs, David Bowie baby grow size 9-12months, a vintage style rattle, A woodland rabbit miniature night light, A Lapin & Me mini panda, a make your own banner set and a spinning top toy.

    To be in with a chance of winning all of these: Make sure you are following me on IG asideorderofme tag two friends and repost the giveaway image with 6monthsgiveaway

    The winner will be selected by random on the 2nd of July.

    Good luck and thanks again for your support. I look forward to the next 6 months with you,

    Ali x

  • Sound of silence

    “I will hunt you down and ring on your doorbell at 4am to wake you up” are the words I shouted at a passing car today.

    This is what motherhood has done to me. I have turned into that muttering down the street at all the noises keeping my baby awake kind of person.

    WHAT IS UP with all the noises?! Where did they come from. I swear they only appeared once I had a baby that showed preference for pram sleeping.

    I could go for a walk with her to get her to sleep and every other house will have a drill, lawnmower, radio, strimmer or building work going on.

    And the cars. Tell me, has there been an increase in men driving ridiculous cars to compensate for their ‘short’ comings? The revving and loud music that whizz past us, causing her to exorcist jolt make my veins pulsate.

    Go away noises, you are exhausting me,

    Ali x



  • Turning 5months and a week of firsts

    PhotoGrid_1433706900800   5 months and a week of so many firsts.

    It began with a spoon. After weeks of her eyeing up my food with puppy eyes, I decided to start weaning her.

    Being my child I knew she would love food and she totally did. We are surfing the bland wave at the moment to adjust her tummy but I am ready and excited to introduce her to all the delights out there.

    Then came her first swim. After buying a gazillion cute swimsuits I thought I should actually put her in one. And the delay was only due to my fear of putting on swimwear.

    Off we went. Her looking adorable. Me in the only thing I had, a maternity swimsuit that made my boobage look mighty big.

    And again she really enjoyed the experience. Even when I made nanna do the dunk. And even when I had a little underwater boob spillage.

    So just when I thought our week had been eventful enough, she started rolling with her homies.

    After days of getting stuck trying. She finally did it. Turned over repeatedly.

    That’s it now, it is all zooming by. The changes are going to keep slapping me round the face until she is a teenager and I am slapping myself round the face.

    But although it has been milestone central it has been such a fab month and I feel this little person I grew has become a real tiny human, imitating, exploring and absorbing pieces of me.

    Though I also have learnt not to talk to her in the voice of the Exorcist anymore as she now does it back. Imagine that in playgroup,

    Ali x


  • Monochrome madness

    I love black n white things on Phoebe. It is neither dark or depressing. In fact I think it brightens her face up. There are some fantastic things you can buy for babies and kids on the internet. A lot of which I got my inspiration from sellers on Instagram.

    We have a nice collection of monochrome clothes. These are two of my favourite buys. The vest from www.sidneyboo.co.uk and the reversible camera dress from Etsy.

    Ali x

  • One in a melon

    Anne Geddes eat your heart out. I am watermelon mad. So Phoebe has been subjected to my passion and is now the owner of some watermelon shoes that I decorated.

    Thank you Ebay for the cheap canvas baby shoes and fabric pens,

    Ali x

  • Open till midnight


    ‘Say no more, mon amour” I just had to pay homage to one of my favorite films Empire Records. 90s grunge was such a large part of my youth and Empire Records oozed all of that.

    Personalised baby grow from Ebay, Tights and skirt from Mothercare. All that is missing is Doc Martens and a floppy haircut,

    Ali x